SERENITY NOW!

for the last two days i have only wanted to eat Papa John's pizza crusts dipped in garlic sauce and drink lemonade made from ghetto lemon juice and ghetto honey. no wonder i feel nauseous. i also feel disgruntled and stressed out and up to my neck in the fucking grant applications.

last night there were scary  noises in our kitchen cabinet.  we are such girls.  constintina heard it and beckoned for help. so J.Mu and i stood on chairs, and argued stratedy. She was arguing for containment, by blocking off the cabinet. I counterproposed blocking off access to the living room and our rooms, luring it out and making it run into the hallway. I felt like we were on Buffy. The end result was us squealing and shutting our eyes poked into the cabinet with broomsticks. That did not accomplish anything, and I went to sleep with the depressed knowledge that if it's a rat, Slumlord will not deal with it, because he "feel[s] an affinity with rats, because [he] was born in the year of the rat." I have the best landlord ever! This morning it was discovered that it caused havoc in the bathroom during the night, knocking everything out of the medicine cabinet, and vandalizing the shampoo/conditioner/shower gel shelf that's pretty high up. So the new theory is, either it's a super-rat, or a squirrel. Also it chewed through the phone cord. I am going out to Walgreens to buy sticky traps in a minute. Help!