(no subject)

[lapsedmodernist]

Given our recent teeth woes, it is clear that we don't sacrifice enough goats in our household.

I had the pleasure of seeing my gums cut open and peeled back in the "mirror" of a microscope looming over my head during the 60-minute procedure.

I "sang" (as in hummed loudly) various Soviet war songs.

"Ah, what songs you remember," said my Russian orthodontist. "I guess you had a broken childhood too. I thought I was the only one."

Um-mmmm-mmmmm-hhh-eeeeeeee, I hummed, drowning out the drill.

My top lip looks like Angelina Jolie's lips and breasts combined. Also my gums are sown together with black thread. I have Frankengums! Soon they will be animated by lightning, then they will join forces with the army of Malta Goya and Sam Adams bottles that has been assembled on the kitchen counter, and together they will lead charge into Mordor.

Comments

[somegal.livejournal.com]

I hope you heal quickly! (also, you're the third person on my f-list going through dental woes right now- strange coincidence)

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

thankyou

[congogirl.livejournal.com]

My top lip looks like Angelina Jolie's lips and breasts combined

snort.

hope you feel better. sorry the homeopathy didn't suffice.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

homeopathy was not attempted. will instead use belladonna to poison my own army of gums and bottles when it tries to turn on me.

[dcart.livejournal.com]

That's the scariest god damn thing I've ever read. I literally covered my mouth and nose with my hands and winced.


Have you written here or elsewhere about your background? I've seen references to it that made me realize (and I think I commented to this effect recently) that I know nothing of your life.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

I don't know where specifically I've written about my background...I am originally from the former USSR and a perpetual transient.

[pdanielson.livejournal.com]

Did you see a pereodontist or an endodontist?

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

I have no idea, but the procedure was called apicoectomy or something like that.

[boobirdsfly.livejournal.com]

Ouch and ow.

You made it !!!!
I wish I could hear a recording of the humming with mouth open. :)

Happy healing and lots of tapioca pudding.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

Oh, D, I HATE Tapioca.

Thanks for the healing wishes, tho!

[boobirdsfly.livejournal.com]

Ha ha sorry. Not helpful.

Um.
Happy healing then and eat what you can and like !

:)

[monkeypunk.livejournal.com]

I remember back in 5th grade or so when I had to go in for my first oral surgery procedure they also stitched up the front of my gums with black thread. The oral surgeon as I was leaving said "You'll be tempted to go home and pull down your lower lip to look at the stitches. Don't"

Of course there was nothing I wanted more for the next 2 weeks. Have doctors honestly so forgotten what its like to be human?

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

yeah, the surgeon told me the same thing, to not lift up my lip. Naturally, I've been doing just that all morning.

[boobirdsfly.livejournal.com]

stop it, don't do it, stop it.

don't think of pink elephants.