Fuck you, CNN, intallment #3

[lapsedmodernist]

I woke up to this today:

The Cure for Hurricanes: Nuke Them?
Amateur hurricane-busters have come up with any number of crackpot ideas to spare Florida from ferocious storms. Among them: blowing hurricanes away with giant fans or blowing them up with nuclear warheads.
Poll: Do These Sound Like Good Ideas?

Comments

[warpsmith.livejournal.com]

Perhaps not good ideas, but definitely awesome ideas.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

well, just as long as that important distinction is maintained...

[twotoedsloth.livejournal.com]

Awesome and shocking!

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

touche!
I inquired about you to Chair yesterday and he said that you had a great sense of humor.

[garagedream.livejournal.com]

florida sucks.

[flynngrrl.livejournal.com]

Call me crazy, but no.

Correction, call them crazy.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

don't start bringing logic into this now.

[stillwell.livejournal.com]

They missed my suggestion about offering human sacrifice! (Guess which human I elect/select?) ;)

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

I'd guess but what if it earns you a visit from Ze Department of Faderland, I mean Homeland Security?

[stillwell.livejournal.com]

True. Mean, squinty eyes are everywhere.

[trochee.livejournal.com]

oo. Here's more bad ideas. My favorite was that last one: Tornado Fighters, which has a marvelously over-the-top macho attitude. But it can't top nuclear weapons.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

I greatly enjoyed the tornado fighters page until I took their poll which made me doubt the seriousness of the whole enterprise. I feel very played. I am not even sure that ethical committee for meteomanipulation even exists.

[trochee.livejournal.com]

I think you must have spent more time reading it than I did. There is a sort of Real Ultimate Power feeling to Tornado Fighters, especially in the fine details page, where they get into specifics of explosives and ordnance.

But I'm still not convinced it's not somebody with an explosives obsession who's deeply into natural-disaster-porn.

[apropos.livejournal.com]

Man, that is like a little time capsule about what's wrong with people these days.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

Pretty much. Add to it the fact that the US army is giving women boob jobs as enlistment perks, and you've got it.

not sure if i really mean to be THIS harsh but

[claudelemonde.livejournal.com]

FLORIDIANS: you have hurricanes EVERY YEAR. sucks, but if you can't deal with it, LEAVE. put up or shut up, holmes. is chicago asking for nationwide nuclear assistance with WINTER? am i cryin about earthquakes? no. no. CRAM IT.

Re: not sure if i really mean to be THIS harsh but

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

ok, yeah, I totally hear you, but don't be giving them any ideas to. Nuclear winter: not scary anymore! Be warm (and glowing) year-round!

[seltix.livejournal.com]

couldn't superman, like, just blow them out to space? or maybe spin in the opposite direction, thereby cancelling them out?

has anyone even *thought* to ask him for help?

damn.

[lapsedmodernist.livejournal.com]

The whole letter-on-the-chest thing is too evocative of whoredom and sodomy for the neofundie mentality.

[seltix.livejournal.com]

well sure, that's the obvious answer. but it's also just what *they* want you to think.