(no subject)

Now in addition to urban dyslexia I have urban vertigo. I mistook convenience store clerks for owls, not really but in that evocative/momentarily absolutely real trippy way, I mistook a black hose for a snake (in the middle of an intersection, a wet, black, glistening snake the size of which I have only seen in the Amazon), there were two trains on the platform, going to the same destination (mine), and I switched from one to the other, thinking, how nonsensical! how ritualistic! how perfect! I remembered Industrial Home for the Blind, although the weather was different, and I was different and my loves were different. But it was the same kind of glitch in the matrix, and it happened in a subway station, too.

Skyscrapes scare me and make me think of human beehives, I think any house above five stories is inhuman. But at the same time I can imagine looking out of window onto of deep dark green of a sea (the non-tropical variety, please) and industrial decay in all of its urban hint-de-sicle splendor, crumbling brick streaked with ivy and plenty of complicated black metal, like art nouveau, but with right angles iinstead of curls and rusted machinery instead of anatomically correct flowers, and gasoline rainbows in small pools of oil all around, and think of both of them as somewhere I could be (and be soothed, but at such different frequencies).

A car with a siren just passed outside the window, I saw the lights, but no sound, like the Flying Dutchman.