the horror, the horror!

i just nearly drove my car off the road. there i was, merrily driving along from the Borders where i used to work, back to my parents' suburban subdivision duplex, the cookie-cutter manifestation of their immigrant-rags-to-middle class journey. there is a mormon church about a quarter mile from my house which is like this amazing aberration; mostly i see it at night when i am driving back from the interstate, and i've always had the approach-avoidance dillemma when it came to it, as in i was tempted to get off at a different exit, and thus be spared the sight of it after midnight, but inevitably i always got off on lake, and drove past it, in masochistic horror. the thing is, it comes out of the dark spearheaded by this weird triangular formation that makes it look like a hologram image of howard roark's worst nightmare. it is also made out of this off-white stone that is reminiscent of soapstone, but with this industrial veneer. it also has its own lighting that's cemetary-white-blue in hue, which means that at night this contraption is lit up with a horrible phosphorenscent glow, which makes me think of bleached bones in moonlight. and also asbestos. anyway, i am driving past it today, and i cast a look at it, with a pleasant thought of "oh, it's less creepy during the day" preemtively forming in my head, when my eye is caught by very, very bright colors, which a moment later i realize is a nativity scene, but the kicker is, every figure in it is not life-size, but, rather, about one-and-a-half times larger in proportion than regular humans would be. so it's like a nativity scene with giants. the disturbing thing, it did not look like it was meant to be executed in an exaggerated scale, which at least would fit into ritualistic traditions, i mean we have the easter island statues and whatnot, but no, it was like, they were trying to do a life-size scale, but their idea of how humans are sized is seven foot tall, which is just beyond creepy, because now i will drive past the death-glow of the mormon church, with a big golden angel trumping on top, and will imagine that it is inhabited by GIANT MORMONS who turn the oversized, large-print pages of their copy of the latter-day saints bible with their fingers as big and thick as sausages. and not those little sausages that go on the regular $1.50 hot dog at a hot dog stand, but those BIG roasted ones, with some German name that is floating unverbalized on the periphery of my consciousness right now. but you know what i mean. those big ones. with fingernails as big as the new dollar coins.

(no subject)

am in mexico with parents.

it's sunny and there are strawberry daiqueries, i am balancing my reading load splitting it between deleuze and pulp fiction. very schizo, i know. i guess that'a appropriate to the deleuze part of it.

um, i will forget to post this if i don't now, so WTF was up with buffy's last segment on tuesday? i will write more about this in detail later ,but did my beloved buffy sound like Dubya there? or is it me, too depressed by Dubyubiquitousness that read shit into her speech? no, i really think it was a conscious decision on the writers' part to make her sound like Our Brave Leader. i really hope that this iwll lead to a lesson in hubris, rather than meaning that buffy writers just jumped on the brainwhased wagon on uncritical patriotism and aggression against Evil (The First, Axis, whatever), in which case i will have to shoot my TV.